June 25, 2020

Leaning Not

Even in the midst of coronavirus-related lockdown entropy, the past few months have been quite eventful for me. Prior to the virus situation, I was preparing for my daughters’ graduations from our homeschool – in fact, I was serving as coordinator for our local group’s spring formal and graduation ceremony – while also navigating the emotion-laden road of my impending “retirement” from homeschooling. And when lockdown measures went into effect, none of that went away. On the contrary, I doubled down on the dance and ceremony, determined to do everything I could to retain them, while remaining keenly aware of my status as a homeschool short-timer. I also helped the girls adjust to finishing a class via Zoom, adapted to having my husband home and working from our basement, and provided emotional support for one daughter, who was furloughed from work and all her volunteer activities. And then – just hours before our state supreme court issued a ruling ending the lockdown – my other daughter announced that she and her beau had eloped!


We did have our spring formal, and we did hold a (live) graduation ceremony. Both events looked somewhat different than originally anticipated, but the ceremony was beautiful and the dance was arguably better than a “normal” one. I survived the initial shock I felt about the elopement – we are thankful our new son-in-law is a very good man who loves the Lord – and we’re currently planning a July reception. My husband is still ensconced in the basement, and our other daughter’s life hasn’t yet returned to any sense of normalcy. But she’s gearing up for a new adventure at Bible college this fall, and we’re fervently praying it won’t be hindered.


I haven’t yet owned my new identity as a “retiree.” In fact, I still feel strange about no longer keeping daily learning logs for the girls. But perhaps all the uncertainty, upheaval, and change with which I’ve dealt over the last thirteen weeks will actually facilitate that process. I’ve certainly had much opportunity to remember Proverbs 3.5 in recent months, and that’s as good a lesson as any to continue applying as I go forward from here.


Photo Credit: Rays of Bliss

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